Married 2 a Monster

Welcome… and I’m sorry we have to meet on a forum such as this.

I would like to invite you to join me on my journey, as I navigate healing from the abuses I suffered due to my spouse’s Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). Narcissistic abuse is real – and it is a form of domestic violence. Most abused spouses will suffer from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) or even Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD). It is vital for victims to find a trauma recovery specialist to help on the healing journey.

Emotional and verbal abuse are often considered “hidden” abuse because the affects are not visible.

The goal of this website it to bring awareness to the fall-out of being in a relationship with someone who has a Cluster B Personality Disorder, and to give the hope of healing to the women who have suffered abuse at the hands of their spouse/partner.

In addition to bringing awareness to the trauma brought on by these relationships, I will help you navigate your healing with words of wisdom, examples of what healing looks like, the emotional roller-coaster and more. Additionally, I will be seeking to interview experts who will help you, too.

The suicide rate among domestic violence victims is very high. Some are women killed by the very hands of the partner who was supposed to be their equal and protector. Some women have extreme mental illness. The affects of psychological damage are so profound that this is truly a “mind, body, spirit” healing. In essence, it is as if the disordered partner has killed their spouse’s very soul, along with their memories, hopes and dreams.

A mentor told me as I began my healing, “You now know what you are dealing with… you received a second chance – a chance that another woman did not get. Use it – embrace it.” And with that, she encouraged me to help you!

Click on one of the menu items for further information. And, to read the blog, click HERE. I am available to answer questions in the comment section, or for privacy, feel free to send me an email.

Note: All comments on the blog will be closely monitored. This is a place for healing and sharing, not a place to be rude, abusive, and, for lack of a better word – narcissistic. We will all play nice, or you are bounced out. It’s that simple. Boundary setting is a must when dealing with narcissists. And those are the rules on my site.

Welcome… and I’m sorry we have to meet on a forum such as this.

I would like to invite you to join me on my journey, as I navigate healing from the abuses I suffered due to my spouse’s Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD). Narcissistic abuse is real – and it is a form of domestic violence. Most abused spouses will suffer from Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) or even Complex Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (C-PTSD). It is vital for victims to find a trauma recovery specialist to help on the healing journey.

Emotional and verbal abuse are often considered “hidden” abuse because the affects are not visible.

The goal of this website it to bring awareness to the fall-out of being in a relationship with someone who has a Cluster B Personality Disorder, and to give the hope of healing to the women who have suffered abuse at the hands of their spouse/partner.

In addition to bringing awareness to the trauma brought on by these relationships, I will help you navigate your healing with words of wisdom, examples of what healing looks like, the emotional roller-coaster and more. Additionally, I will be seeking to interview experts who will help you, too.

The suicide rate among domestic violence victims is very high. Some are women killed by the very hands of the partner who was supposed to be their equal and protector. Some women have extreme mental illness. The affects of psychological damage are so profound that this is truly a “mind, body, spirit” healing. In essence, it is as if the disordered partner has killed their spouse’s very soul, along with their memories, hopes and dreams.

A mentor told me as I began my healing, “You now know what you are dealing with… you received a second chance – a chance that another woman did not get. Use it – embrace it.” And with that, she encouraged me to help you!

Click on one of the menu items for further information. And, to read the blog, click HERE. I am available to answer questions in the comment section, or for privacy, feel free to send me an email.

Note: All comments on the blog will be closely monitored. This is a place for healing and sharing, not a place to be rude, abusive, and, for lack of a better word – narcissistic. We will all play nice, or you are bounced out. It’s that simple. Boundary setting is a must when dealing with narcissists. And those are the rules on my site.

Welcome.

I wish I wasn’t here, and I’m sure you are wishing you weren’t as well. I was shocked to learn I was Married to a Monster. But the more I learn about Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD), the more I feel called to share my healing journey with you.

While NPD is more prevalent in men than women, it is a disorder that crosses all gender and socio-economic lines. So, while I would love for anyone dealing with a monster to garner some help, support and information from me, please know where it is that I am writing from. I will use “him” when referring to a narcissist, but if your situation is different, use “her.”

I am a woman who is highly spiritual. I also have expectations of high morals and values from others. Just because I am hurting, I don’t feel the need to override my conscience and hurt others – which is exactly what someone with NPD does. They do so on a conscious and unconscious level. Most people with NPD have learned their behavior, entitlement attitude, and other awful coping mechanisms to survive childhood trauma.

My spirituality is important to my healing. I shelved my religious beliefs the further I have come in my healing from narcissistic abuse. I want to share that many messages I have received “from the church” have been extremely harmful – adding to the abuse. So what I was raised up in as a child has been shed, and has evolved into something deeper and more meaningful for me and does not involved a church environment.

Please understand when you are reading about my life that there will be days – like today – when I have hope. And there will be other days when I feel nothing but despair. One of the most frustrating things in dealing with putting your life back together after decades of abuse is trying to balance the good and the bad. It’s like being on a roller coaster you can’t stop.

If you are in the midst of this mess, like me, I want you to stop and think about you. Who are you? It is a question my therapist asked me, and I broke down and cried. I didn’t know then, but I am trying to learn now. Who am I? How did this happen? All those questions and feelings are normal. And you are normal. It’s okay to hurt. It’s okay to be furious. It’s okay to have compassion for yourself. And don’t feel guilty for feeling compassion for your disordered partner. Something really bad happened to make him/her be the way he is. But… you are not responsible for his healing. You are not responsible for his actions. The only thing you are responsible for is you and your healing. Try not to let that impede your progress.

My monster was willing to seek help, and try to repair and restore the damage he did to me, our children, other family members and all others that have crossed his path. Yet, through the five years since my world blew up from his behavior, it has been an up-and-down battle. He quit therapy numerous times. The lying and abuse didn’t stop. At one time, we were going to do this blog as a joint story. However, that has changed as I filed for divorce.

So, thanks for walking beside me on this difficult journey. Feel free to reach out and grasp my hand, and I hope we can be a help to one another.

To read the blog, click HERE.

To contact me privately, click HERE.